True, it's already my main aim now after a long chain of events... Basically I used to trust people to easily and get hurt a lot, then I became reclusive to cope,
and a while ago I realised I still need to talk to friends, as there are a few people I can trust, so I need to keep talking to them...

But my main problem right now is being able to do work, since I went back to school I was struggling with the amount of work to begin with,
but after I started getting stressed, I found it almost impossible... I'm getting less stressed now thankfully,
but I've still not finished a bit of work for the past week... and I need to for tomorrow...

Is there any chance you could go to a different, public 6th form college rather than carrying on going private?
My friend went to a private school for 6th and all I can say is that he would've been better off staying in our school as the expectations are lower and therefore a lot less stressful.

I think in your case it would help a lot as you said you already don't like the people in your school, I don't like to generalise but I have seen a trend that privately educated people are quite posh and snobby, less about heart and friendship and more about money and success.

I'm not too sure, that's what I was thinking about today, some people are bit more stuck up I would say, but my problem is that they're just not very nice...
But I don't think I would actually do that, because I do have quite a few friends at my school, funnily enough all my good friends at my school were like me,
and used to go to a public school as well.

There are too many people who are annoying, or which I have good reason not to like though, so I'm not too sure right now,
Another problem for me is I don't know what the girls will be like, because in the tiny number of mixed projects we do,
there's quite a few I already dis-like, or would make a large effort to avoid...
The worst thing for me is girls befriends my friends, as I kinda want a group of friends which is the same as it always was,
kinda where I can feel safe, or be a bit happier than usual

You should try to be on the good side of people rather than avoid them completely, small talk is good social practice.
Imagine yourself working in the future, essentially your workgroup is a classroom, there's going to be people you like and dislike, except not getting to know those you work with could play against you as often or not you're going to need favours or need to work on projects with them.

Also if you get more comfortable around people you dislike, you'd feel safer in the situations you described.
After all, getting over reclusion is being able to adapt to society and everyone within it.

Social circles are cumulous pop. There were a few in mine I didn't like very much at high school, but I didn't have to interact constantly with everybody that my friends did. You can have a group of three very close-knit friends in a larger circle of ten or twelve. That's how I find it usually works, don't expect to have a lot of things in common with everybody you come in contact with in a school setting.

Also, don't assume that because you don't get along with some girls it will make things awkward. There will be others too that you will be able to make friends with.

A little less than two years. For most of my life I've tried to fit in and be social. I had friends all through high school. But a couple years ago when high school ended, I decided to give up. Being social and going outside every day really doesn't interest me. I only hung out with two or three people after that decision. It was mostly because I liked smoking weed with them and if Iwanted to get high by myself, I'd have to go through them to get it so I stayed on good terms with them.

But after a while, even that just seemed boring to me. I haven't hung out with any friends for at least a year and a half. I can only feel comfortable being around others for a little while at a time. After that, I'd rather just be by myself in my room the rest of the day. I live with my parents and a couple sisters. I feel I get adequate social interaction from them. Enough to fulfill my desire to talk to others. So I'm fine.

ditto homie...you aight the only one......when shit happens you gotta roll with the punches.....still hurts tho

Yeah it used to. I would like to be one of those guys where going out and meeting people is like breathing, but I'm not willing to put in the effort to do that . It's just not me. It did used to hurt alot when I was first making this decision. But now, it's just like a whatever feeling. Like I said, I am fine now for the most part.

well thats good then.....i wish i wuz like that too but i get super embarresed in pulic over nothin.....so i quit trying a while ago

I guess I've been a recluse for 1.5 years now. I gradually lost contact with all my friends and now I don't have any. I only go out to attend appointments once or twice a fortnight to show that I'm looking for work (although I'm not really). If I don't attend they stop my welfare money.
If it wasn't for that I'd never leave my house.
I try not to look directly at people unless I know I'm going to talk to them.
A couple of days ago I was on my way to an appointment when all of a sudden someone stopped and talked to me. It really scared me, after about five seconds I saw that it was only my sister, It was at that moment that I realised I'm a recluse.

I'm not living as a recluse anymore, so I don't really count. It's only when I go back home from uni that I go back (somewhat) to my old ways.

My more fully reclusive lifestyle lasted for...hmm, it's hard to put a definite starting point on it. The entirety of my secondary school years was quite reclusive, but it didn't feel that way so much because I had to go to school. Sixth form (two years) was much more so, because I had more time to myself and it was easier to keep to myself when I was at school and everyone else got on with their social lives. Then I took a year out and was very reclusive and didn't go out of the house much at all. If I did, it was on solitary walks around fields.

I don't want to be as reclusive as that for the rest of my life, however I do feel like I am naturally a bit of a loner, so when I'm older, I may try to strike a balance between having people I can see and call friends and having time to myself.

I've been a recluse for about 9 years now. I've always been a person who likes to spend some time alone every once in awhile. I actually pretty much enjoy solitude. However, there are times, I need some kind of company. Even though I'm more of a recluse now, I'm still on the verge of being a Hikikomori. I don't have many reasons to leave my apartment, because I lost contact with all my so-called rl friends and I don't go to a regular school anymore either, as I'm currently catching up on my education via correspondence school/distance learning.
If it wouldn't be for my (mental and physical) health, I wouldn't leave my home for weeks.

I was always more solitary, never gregarious, but now I really just don't like people contact at all (HATE having to deal with cashiers!), except for family and a few true friends (and good forums). I'm my own best company, and with the zillion passionate interests I have hardly any time for (because I have to lie down so much), the last thing I need is useless social interaction defrauding me of time and energy.

I've become more reclusive in the past 6 years or so; I resent the fact that, especially because of all the illegals, you can't find decent solitude anymore at the beach or at the park: everywhere you go, bodies and chatter, bodies and prattle---and then, the incessant fiestas! With the loud music! ARRRGH! If you're going to coopt my beloved lake and park, then at least refrain from blasting your dreadful "music" across the whole countryside, for crying out loud!

i'm the same way homegirl.......i refuse to go into a store to buy food because of the damn cashiers....they alway look at you and give you a judging stare....at least in my case.......i usually send my dad or other family to go pick food up for me.....

ditto aswell with the few true friends part.....pretty much ditto to everything you said in the first paragraph.......Every word of it....

i'm mexican...so i understand why those so called "illegals" are bumping music louder than shit.....

they are just tryna have fun since they don't have much else.....

but i also understand you being irritated over not having any peace and solitude since i'm the same way.....i enjoy being alone with nobody bothering me or getting in my way.....so ditto once again...

PS they like being called mexican more than being labeled Illegals.....i don't think its a crime to WANT a better FUTURE for your family......BTW i was born in california so i'm not an illegal....(but i understand the situation)

I've said 5 years but i think even as a child i didn't like going places. Currently i go to work for 4 hours on saturday and get anything i need from town after, i also go to collage duering the week but they dont mind too much if i take a couple of days off a week luckly theyve never expeled anyone for non attendance. Ocationaly a friend will either come over or drag me to the pub but that tends to be only once a week or two weeks. I gotta say i'm happy like this but i'll be happyer in june when i finish collage.

About a year and a half, but I've been reclusive on and off my whole life. My usual inclination is to avoid socializing. I've had periods of time when I was fairly social like during grade school and college, but I've also had times, like now, when I hardly go out or speak to anyone other than my family or friend.

In the past, I felt guilty for being asocial. I still feel like that sometimes, so I occasionally do something social for my family. In general, though, I accept the way I am and I'm much happier.

20 years

My entire life.

I have never gone out for anything social ever (not even as a kid).

i was reclusive for all school period, today i seek for new people to to associate with them.

Hello there, new guy here.

Been reclusive most of my life, with small periods in between of fitting in, but never for long. Always managed to draw back and isolate myself, leading most people I've met to think I'm some kind of weirdo. I'm even reclusive on online forums, and even if I try, people seem to generally avoid me, or at least that's the vibe I get...

I been developing into a recluse with very minimal social needs since the age of 14. From there, I just start becoming more apathetic with stronger negative emotions which in turn led me to be apathetic about the world around me and I don't feel the urges of socializing with people starting from the age of 16. I just accept being a hermit and really enjoy it though being around people makes me suffer a lot. So, I am nearly a official recluse despite I have one female friend that I spend <2 mins while seeing her once a week.

[quote="Knots"]I tell them I'm busy, I always am. I'm always in a rush too; a rush to get back to my work,
a rush to get away from you. No offense! It's not you, it's me. It always is.
If you stop returning calls or e-mails, they leave you alone, so I've learned... I feel pretty
guilty about this, though the older I get, the less I care.

Same thing here. I've burned more bridges than I'd like to remember.

I said 3 years because that's when I actively refused invitations and hangout calls. I've always been lonesome and sometimes reclusive, but it wasn't until I was 17 that I began acting out (in?) on my nature.

It's adding up to 8 years for me. It didn't feel like it but time flies, it started when I was 21, for 4 years I was a recluse and I had to move with my family when I was 25, getting used to the new life style, and wasting time here and there, another 4 years went by.