I think she was saying she wanted too do a customer service report on people who had not used the product.... For the product we were trying to get feedback in.

do you want ketchup?.....hell ya dumb ho i WANT my tomato squashed

After seeing this thread I have to mention Not Always Right I site with stupid customer quotes

Not customers, but along the line of The stupid things people say


My mother had this fun anecdote to share the other day:
A colleague of her said that he had noticed climate changes.
My mother: “oh, how so?”
Colleague: “Yeah, in the morning of Christmas eve, I saw the sun.”
My mother: “But we never lose the sun here*, so if you don’t see it [in daytime], it’s because it’s cloudy.”
Colleague: “I’ve never seen the sun on Dec 24th before, so that was due to climate change.”


* meaning that in southern norway we dont have polar night

Something I got reminded of today,

When I worked at a Starbucks people would always make snarky criticisms to me about the cup size names (Tall, Grande, Venti) like it's the first fucking time I've ever heard or thought about it.

1. If you just say small or medium, I'm not stupid, I know what the fuck you're talking about and think nothing of it.
2. Believe it or not, I don't control their corporate marketing ...so your un-clever little explosion of observational un-humor is just annoying.

This is not just exclusively Starbucks, you get these people/jokes/rants when you work for any corporation.

For that matter, I'll include people who bitch at you for working in a corporation. I don't mean CEO's or any high level job, I mean like...you just work in the store. It's just a job, I just want a paycheck, I'm not making a statement and I don't care about yours.

I worked part-time at a small fashion store for armani and golf clothes...
I heard lots of stupid things there o_o

"Do you have a bag?" (-no we don't have one for you, you have to buy more of this 500€ (~800$) jackets!)

"Do I look like Charlie Sheen in this shirt?" (-no, it's exactly the same as he wears, but... you're fatter!)

Me: "Do you like some coffee during the meeting?"
Representative: "Yes, but do you have any?"
(I brought her a espresso )

I also worked at a sushi restaurant...

"Have you ever sold one of this party tablets?" (no, we just prepare them xD)

"Are you a assistant?" - I was wearing a damn apron! and a UNIFORM! - no, I am a customer xDD

oh this thread never fails to cheer me up! Keep 'em coming peeps!

The stupid things bus drivers say:
This happened about 20 years ago. I got on the bus one morning. I had kept the ticket (which had been stamped on the tube and was still valid) in my pocket and showed it to the driver. Having been in pocket, the right corner of the ticket had gotten slightly dogeared and the driver said: “This isn’t valid”
Annoyed at his slow brain I snapped: “Just flip the corner and you’ll see”
The driver had the audacity to tell me to calm down and did what I suggested.
Fricking idiot, do your job properly in the first place, instead of making an ass of yourself by telling the passenger that the ticket isn’t valid when it is. If that is too hard for you, get a sheltered job, you seem to need it.

I once worked as a telesales pimp, randomly ringing people on the very slim chance that their house didn't already have windows. There are few jobs that I can think of that I'm less suited to do. There was a prepared script that we had to read out in a voice which suggested that we gave a fuck. I had no enthusiasm for the job, but I tried to compensate by getting a bit drunk before arriving at work. I ended up quitting when I realised that I was spending more on alcohol than I was actually earning.

Gavrilo: Hi! I'm Gavrilo from xxxxxxxxxx windows. Do you want some fucking windows. (I forget the exact wording of the script).
Customer: What sort of windows are they? Do they have - (I don't remember what the guy said and if I did it would be fucking boring. Long story short, this guy knew his fucking windows).
Gavrilo: Yeah sure. They have all that.
Customer: But there's no such thing as (Again my technical knowledge of double glazing fails me. He could have said unicorn proof for all I fucking knew or cared).
Gavrilo: Yeah they have that.
Customer: You don't know what you're talking about. I work with double glazing and....
Gavrilo: That's very interesting. Do you want any windows?
Customer: Listen to me you little fucking...
Gavrilo: You don't wan't any windows. Ok bye bye.

I lasted about 2 weeks.

xD Oh yes.

i want a soft drink......(customer)




what the fuck is a soft drink?.....(clerk "me")



oh i mean fountain drink....(customer)


?????........i'm going to have to get my manager...(clerk"me")

Once a lady asked me for "salad oil". I'm asking her what that is, is it a salad dressing or something? And she keeps saying "No, you know, salad oil!" No more information. So finally I sent her to cooking oil to get rid of her.