I believe she means materialistic jealousy as opposed to sexual attraction jealousy.

They're both shades of the same glass tough. I think .

Or rather, envy?

Jealousy is worse I think. It's one of my downfalls that I get jealous easily. I've been teaching myself to control it.

That is probably my biggest weakness in romantic relationships. I'm very jealous - but only under certain conditions and only if I already am in a relationship with a person. If I, for instance, had a crush on someone and learn that this person likes somebody else, I'd usually get over it (and the person) quite easily. I'm jealous when I have already developed very serious and deep feelings for someone, and that usually takes a lot of time to evolve and requires the mutuality of those feelings*.


As far as I have learned people usually treat their jealousy in one of two ways:

1. Neglect:
People, who either don't feel any or try to suppress their jealousy - with varying degrees of success. Some do it with admirable countenance, they really manage to not let their behavior be guided by feelings of jealousy at all. I sincerely wish I would belong to that category. However, some other individuals within this category develop the nasty habit of tailing their significant other and nose around their belongings in search of "evidence". That's something I find pretty disgusting personally and it's completely alien to me. I'd never ever let myself down to such behavior. Likewise I'd freak out if my significant other would do such things to me. I'm an (ultra-)honest person and I can be asked anything, there's really no need to sneak around.

2. Confrontation:
That's the category I belong to. My approach is to meet my fears head on, especially those which are most painful and frightening. Actually I try to do this in every aspect of my life - at least as far as I can bear it with regard to my depressive episodes. I behave in this way to overcome possibly false fears as quickly as possible (in order to avoid to have to endure them any longer) - or, if they prove to be justified, to adapt as quickly as possible.
It's not always easy in a romantic relationship with this trait, especially when you belong to category 2 and are with someone from category 1, who usually doesn't (want to) understand why and how openly talking about feelings of jealousy can positively contribute to the quality of the relationship in any way.
Of course there are different modi operandi in this category, too: let's call them "the paranoid accuser" and "the careful oberserver". In my teens I was much more paranoid and quick to jump to conclusions. Today I try to focus on what's really there and if I feel safe in my relationship and trust my significant other, I ask questions in this regard calmly and without prejudgement. I'd definitely need a significant other who understands that I don't speak openly about this, because I want to bother him, but because I need it to feel safe.


In any other respect I'm not jealous at all. I don't envy anyone for their belongings.


* Actually I don't like it that way, but it's not always possible to change the way you feel about things, - even if your rational thinking tells you, that you shouldn't feel that way. Some idiosyncratic gut reactions just have to be accepted the way they are, in ourselves as well as in others.

Not specifically. I know people who get jealous when other people simply have stuff that they don't have. Like if someone had two cars, and they had one, the guy would be jealous anyways even though he doesn't want two cars. The concept is just that someone else has something you don't which can cause jealousy.

Honestly, I'm only jealous if someone has something I've been wanting, such as a slenderman plushie or a touhou figurine. I'm not jealous for people who, say, have My Little Pony figurines, or Homestuck plushies.

Jealousy in relationships is my biggest problem. If I love somebody, I get jealous very easily. It is a horrible feeling and is something I'd love to work towards eliminating(more realistically, controlling and handling without causing conflict).
I don't envy people's material possessions.

I believe it's best for people like us to be with someone who is at least a little bit jealous too. What do you think?

In fact I can handle it pretty well if my significant other is a little bit jealous, and (maybe I shouldn't, but) I find it assuring. Exaggerated and paranoid jealousy might become a problem though, I don't know, that's something I have not experienced so far. However, I('d) find it irritating if my significant other shows no reaction at all when I am being courted or pay too much attention to someone else.

And with regard to "eliminating" jealousy (I'm only jealous in romantic relationships, I don' know whether that is what you wanted to imply as well): I have tried that for half of my life, but the relative strength of the feeling remained unaffected. The more I love a person the more jealous I become, it seems. The only success I could observe is that I have it better under control and that I let my behavior be led less by such emotions. If you should ever learn a way to address such feelings themselves while we're both still here, please let me in on that secret. --------

Yes, I'm only jealous in romantic relationships. And I agree that it is better for people like us to be with others who have bit of a jealous streak. It is assuring. I don't mind re-assuring a partner that there is nothing to worry about. I've definitely acted out of jealousy in the past.. Which doesn't turn out well. But I like to think I've learned from my mistakes to control myself in regards to how I express jealousy. Then again, I haven't been in a relationship in over a year, so I haven't had much practice. I will gladly share the secrets of eliminating it If I learn how to. But, I don't suspect that I'll fall in love and experience that emotion anytime soon, so you may be waiting a long time.

I've noticed the line-shifting, but it doesn't bother me too much.
What does bother me is that I can't put a spoiler over your quote because it already contains a spoiler.

Yes, re-assuring a partner is alright. It doesn't bother me either as long as the jealousy isn't completely exaggerated. I have many male friends and acquaintances. My significant other would have to be able to deal with that fact. So far it was not a problem though, because I tend to pay 3/4 of my attention to my significant other (as soon as I have one) and I try as best as I can to always make sure that there is no reason to doubt my feelings.


That's a pity. And I bet I'm not the only one here who thinks that way.


That bothers me too every time it happens.

So do I, but I have totally platonic friendships with them, so there wouldn't be anything to worry about anyway. I also spend a lot of time on a significant other. They tend to become my best friend and main social outlet. I like it that way.

Same, absolutely.

I don't get jealous easily.

What I find quite discomforting is when a partner is accusing me of mistreating her, when I have a glance at another women.
I see it as a sign of not fully trusting me, which actually makes me feel bad.

I used to be very jealous and then it nearly ended my relationship and after 2-3-4 days of no communication I learned to not be jealous and become quite apathetic in the relationship, not quite sure that's a good thing though in hindsight xD

I can get jealous very easily and not just limited to relationships either.
To keep to topic, I was very jealous of the last ex of my ex bf, because they kept being in touch and I knew she wanted him back at least parts of the time.